Innocent Ramblings of a So-Called Writer

I write for fun and sometimes for money. I make you no promises that this will be funny. I'm not poetic (at least not on purpose). I just blog whatever thoughts float to the surface. Comments to a blogger are like nip to a kitten. Leave me some and I'll be yours - totally smitten.

You have no idea how many stabs I took at that intro. Hence, why I put "So-Called" right there in the title. No false expectations.

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Aug 18

Olympic Female Gymnasts:

The only people left in the world who still wear scrunchies - with no apparent shame, no less. 

gymnasts


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Aug 16

I guess I can scratch "Be referred to as a Femme Fatale" off my list of life goals

Miss Scarlett/Miss Scarlet

Miss Scarlett (Miss Scarlet in the North American version) is the stock Femme Fatale character. She is typically portrayed as young, cunning, and beautiful. When the game was made in 1949, she was a blonde. A 1972 redesign of her features led to speculation that she was of Eurasian ethnicity. In 1996, Miss Scarlett became a sinister brunette with lovely looks. In some scenarios, she is billed as the niece/step-niece (and theoretical heir) of Dr. Black. In various other situations, commonly in American, Scarlett is, or was, a long-term girlfriend of Black/Boddy. In Clue Mysteries, Miss Scarlett is the daughter of Mrs Peacock, whose late first husband was James Scarlett. Jealousy and envy is the base of the mother-daughter relationship, and Mrs Peacock sees the young and beautiful Miss Scarlett as a deadly rival. Cluedo canon nearly always states her occupation as anactress whose career is beginning to decline, or has never taken off to start with due to her lack of talent. Unfortunately for the recent depiction, her dumb personality and her lecherous interests leave an uncertain motive for her to kill Mr. Boddy/Dr. Black (though it is implied that it may have to do with her possible relationship to Mr. Boddy’s uncle, Sir Hugh Black). In the VCR game her character (again of Eurasian ethnicity) is a sexy, cunning spy with Colonel Mustard as her worthless henchman.

Her canon first name is usually Josephine.

In the 1985 film, Miss Scarlett is a madam who owns a brothel in Washington, DC. She is played by Lesley Ann Warren.

 - From Wikipedia


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Aug 14

another reason why it stinks to be a girl...

I just got an email forward that contained a warning about these gross little red spiders that make their home in dark, damp crevices, specifically the underside of toilet seats. They bite you, shoot their toxic venom into you, and you don’t show symptoms until several days later, at which point you will probably be hospitalized and die. They killed several women in Florida who all visited the same restroom at an Olive Garden. 

I am officially never using a public toilet again. 


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Aug 14

Clue: The Musical: The Audition Update

I’m Miss Scarlet. 

I’m an actress. Well a singer. Maybe more of a performer. Anyway, I guess you could say I do it all. Or at least that is what my men friends tell me. Now, nobody knows this, but when I first met Mr. Boddy, I was performing in Las Vegas. I was opening for a dog juggling act at Billy’s Bar, Grille and Casino.  Mr. Boddy was in Vegas on business. He saw the show, loved it, and asked if I would give him an encore in his hotel room.  You know me.  I love an audience. 

I got the part. And THAT my dear friends is my opening monologue. 

This is going to be so much fun!


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Aug 12

Bah.

You know what stinks? Driving four hours to atlanta only to have your cubs game get rained out and then drive four hours home. At least I got to see my awesome little bro! Thanks Mike and Sara for salvaging our trip!

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Aug 12

Cross your fingers!

So, last night I auditioned for  ”Clue: The Musical” at the Matthews Playhouse. I was auditioning for the role of Miss Scarlet, who is apparently quite the flirt. 

The coolest thing about this show is that there is a different ending at every performance AND the actors in the show don’t even know what ending it will be until cards are drawn live on stage at the beginning of the performance! How fun is that? I will answer for you. SO FUN. 

Anyway, cross your fingers for me! I think my audition went well… my song wasn’t flawless, but it wasn’t horrible, and my monologue reading was a big hit!

I haven’t been in a production since 1999, and just the audition process last night gave me the biggest buzz! I would love, love, LOVE the chance to be on stage again.  


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Aug 11
“A fingertip did the victory,” said Amaury Leveaux, one of the French swimmers. “It is nothing.” Seriously, could that sound more stereotypically French? Perhaps if Sports Illustrated had written the quote like, “Eet eez noosthing.” 

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Aug 11

Na Na Na Na Na... Nananana na na.... Way Cool!

Clarissa Explains it All ( or as my dad used to call it, “Claudia Tells You Things.”) is now available on iTunes. 

Look out 90’s! Here I come!


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Aug 10

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Aug 7

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